Anger Management

Wednesday, April 25, 2018

Anger is all around us because we live in an angry society. If you do not believe me, then drive around Miami for 5 minutes and see if you don’t get angry. Quite honestly, a lot of us just don’t want to deal with it because we are in denial that anger is not that bad or maybe you think you don’t struggle with anger or that you don’t get “that” angry. We may handle it differently, but none of us can escape the emotion entirely. You fail a test; you get cheated on; your parents get divorced; you stub your toe; you have to draw 20 cards in Uno…It doesn’t matter who you are, anger comes for us all and we need to be ready to fight against it and not let it ruin our lives! We have a choice.When it comes to our anger we can deal with it or get destroyed by it!


Here are three things to AVOID when you’re angry:

SUPPRESS IT - When you suppress your anger, you store up explosives in your heart.

Don’t store your anger up on the inside. When you suppress your anger, you become a time bomb ready to explode on any given day. This is why we need to learn how to be PROACTIVE instead of REACTIVE.What do I mean? At any day and anytime, something can trigger you. What are you going to do about it? Are you creating habits of reacting all the time or being proactive? The choice is yours. Reactive people make choices out of impulse – they have no self-control. Proactive people make choices based on values. If we value Jesus, we want to be like Him - love like Him. Proactive people recognize they cannot control everything that happens to them but they can control what they do about it.

“Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control.” Proverbs 25:28 NIV  

The fact is we cannot control the things that happen to us. We cannot control who hurts us, what the weather will be, if the Dolphins will ever go to the super bowl. But there is one thing we can control, how we respond to what happens to us!

REPRESS IT - When you repress your anger, you reject yourself from getting help.

“The first step in solving a problem is to recognize that it does exist.” - Zig Ziglar

When you repress your anger, you’re simply denying it’s there. We cannot get better unless we tell the doctor what’s wrong with us.

“When Jesus heard it, he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance." Mark 2:17 KJV

Here is the good news about your anger. You may have grown up in a home where anger was consistently expressed in appropriate ways. Inappropriate anger is learned, but it can be unlearned, too. You can change. You do not have to stay the same. Confess it!

EXPRESS IT - Every time you express your anger in a negative way, it will affect your life and those around you in a negative way

“My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.” James 1:19-21 NIV

We do just the opposite. We are quick to speak, slow to listen, and swift to become angry. That is backward! However, if you do the first two — be slow to speak and quick to listen — the last part will be automatic. You will find yourself becoming angry less often and less naturally. It is not enough just to slow down when we are angry. Take extra time to THINK about what to say or do next.


Author: Phil M.




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